How do we keep our kids looking so young?
We store them in giant pringle-like tubes.Thursday, May 15, 2008
Scientist Discover New Disorder
Gainesville, FL- Physicians and researchers at Shands at the University of Florida released a study today documenting a significant disorder among young affluent females. Advanced Shoe Obsession Syndrome (ASOS) can strike victims as young as 18 months in age. Individuals suffering from the condition experience and overwhelming desire to acquire, hold and ultimately wear various kinds of footwear. Side effects include loss of money, loss of closet space, scattered shoes throughout your residence and skinned knees.
Females with regular exposure a large number of adult shoes are at a significantly elevated risk for falling victim to ASOS. Many victims, such as the one pictured below, even find themselves wearing non-fitting shoes of the wrong gender design, putting her at increased risk for looking silly.
At this time, there is no known cure.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
A Child's Dream
When I was a kid, I freaking loved the t.v. series Airwolf. For the people born later than 1985 reading this blog, Wikipeda explains Airwolf in the following way:
Airwolf is an American television series that ran from 1984 through 1987. The program concerned a supersonic military helicopter, code named Airwolf, and her crew as they undertook various missions, many involving espionage, with a Cold War theme.
So when the American Heros Airshow rolled into town and the newspaper article said you could get helicopter rides, I had to go. After a few minutes of pretending to be interested in the Sheriff's helicopter and the Shands helicopter, I found a small folding table with a simple hand-written sign that said: Helicopter Rides.
After paying $35 a person Evan and I were on our way. Notice I didn't say anything about filling out consent forms or a waiver of liability. In fact there was no paperwork whatsoever. As an attorney, this troubled me. I guess they figure if something goes wrong in a helicopter, you're not going to be around to sue.
I was a little worried Evan would freak out mid-flight, but he absolutely loved it. He looked confused and excited as the chopper fired up.
The inside of the chopper was a little smaller than a Honda Civic. We were flying, I don't know... a couple hundred feet off the ground and going about 100 miles an hour. At my request, they flew right over our house.
I never realized how many of my neighbors had pools. After about 5-6 minutes, they headed back to the airshow where we landed safely. For the next two days, Evan yelled out at random "We went on a helicopter ride. We went high in the sky. We landed real soft." Followed by, "Do it again!"
Airwolf is an American television series that ran from 1984 through 1987. The program concerned a supersonic military helicopter, code named Airwolf, and her crew as they undertook various missions, many involving espionage, with a Cold War theme.
So when the American Heros Airshow rolled into town and the newspaper article said you could get helicopter rides, I had to go. After a few minutes of pretending to be interested in the Sheriff's helicopter and the Shands helicopter, I found a small folding table with a simple hand-written sign that said: Helicopter Rides.
After paying $35 a person Evan and I were on our way. Notice I didn't say anything about filling out consent forms or a waiver of liability. In fact there was no paperwork whatsoever. As an attorney, this troubled me. I guess they figure if something goes wrong in a helicopter, you're not going to be around to sue.
I was a little worried Evan would freak out mid-flight, but he absolutely loved it. He looked confused and excited as the chopper fired up.
The inside of the chopper was a little smaller than a Honda Civic. We were flying, I don't know... a couple hundred feet off the ground and going about 100 miles an hour. At my request, they flew right over our house.
I never realized how many of my neighbors had pools. After about 5-6 minutes, they headed back to the airshow where we landed safely. For the next two days, Evan yelled out at random "We went on a helicopter ride. We went high in the sky. We landed real soft." Followed by, "Do it again!"
Friday, May 9, 2008
Sick
Given the nature of this post, I figured people would rather see a picture of my happy children at Sea World than a picture related to the following subject matter.
Everyone at my house is sick. Beth coughs all night long and has been sick for weeks. Olivia has an ear infection and has such a runny nose we might as well surgically attach a tissue to her. Evan has a head cold and pink eye. This is Olivia's fourth ear infection six months. I am suffering from the sleep disorder known as "familis sickus al nitus".
That is one of the reasons I have not put up many posts lately.
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